While trying to think of something to write this blog about and after talking to my fiancé telling him my assigned task was to write about a proposal argument that has affected me in some way. I am not kidding, two minutes after we have this conversation, his phone rings and obviously, I can only hear his side of the conversation, and I hear him say, “I will ask her and get back to you”. Let me first tell you that we are getting married in exactly six weeks. We have set up several meetings with the minster who is going to marry us, and have had to reschedule them for some reason or another. So, that being said, he says, “hey, babe, Chad has two extra tickets to the Thunder game tomorrow, let’s go”. I reply to this by telling him the game starts at noon and our meeting with the minster is at one-thirty, and I still have some school work to finish. He pretty much begged and pleaded with me to agree to go to the game. He brought some valid and reasonable information to the table, but I stuck to my guns and kept telling him that we had other plans already. He is always dying to go to the Thunder games or any sporting event for that matter since he is a coach. He especially wants to go to the Thunder game because they are in the Playoffs, but we simply just do not have time and had prior engagements. We went to the second Playoff game and don’t get me wrong, it was a lot of fun and I am not trying to be a party pooper, but what was I going to do? Should I forget about getting my homework done and cramming a seven page paper into a few hours, reschedule the minister AGAIN and find a baby sitter. So, the proposal argument he brought to me was, going to the game and having a lot of fun, which means having to reschedule the minster again, putting my homework off and paying a baby sitter. Yes, I would like to go, but I have to get my priorities straight and do the most important things first, which is not going to Thunder game. I told him we could go to another game soon. I explained to him all these points and because he is a smart man, agreed with me to not go to the game and keep our meeting with the minister and let me finish my homework. Haha, I win!
Blog Response to Vanessa’s Blog “ To Thunder Up, or Not to Thunder Up, That is the Question”
ReplyDeleteGood for you Vanessa! When I read your blog about the Thunder game, I understood immediately as I have been married for a little over 30 years (can’t believe it), and for the sake of persuasion or for this case argument, your fiancé had a very convincing one, he is after all a coach, right? The game would be good for him from a professional standpoint, not just from a recreational standpoint! Well, that is how learning about arguments in this class will help you in your future marriage. You have learned about good and bad arguments and how to respond. He made his argument and you countered with an excellent argument of your own! See, you have learned something from this class!
Marriage is about compromise and now that we both understand how to make a really good argument/proposal, etc, we can be more effective! I know that it should not be about who wins in an argument (but I do love to win), or that you can’t always be right, but at least this class has taught us that making a good argument to get to the facts, or to find the best solution to a problem will be helpful the rest of our lives. If you are like most women, me included, we have to compromise constantly, either to go along with what the kids want, our parents, or our spouse. At least we now have a little more knowledge about how to say no in a nice way now, right? And by the way, I wish you both the best in your upcoming marriage. May you keep it real, honest and argumentative-in a positive way!
He was very convincing and I knew he wanted to go really bad, hell, I did too, but we just couldn't. He is a coach, yes and he loves EVERY sport there is, except soccer. HAHA.
ReplyDeleteYou make a good point, marriage is about compromise and I told him we could go to the next one if we got some tickets! I am not opposed to going, I like it a lot, we just couldn't Sunday because of our meeting with the minister and my homework.
I love to win too, but I understand it isn't always about that, even though it does feel really good to win! :)
Thank you so much! We are very excited about our upcoming wedding on June 11th! I can't wait!
Congrats on being married for 30 years, that is amazing!